Left Behind

My three boys loaded up into the van yesterday afternoon and headed out for spring break. 

And they left me behind.

{Why?  I'll explain soon.}

This was the first time that the boys have left me.  We've all been apart before; this is not new.  But it is usually me who is taking the boys somewhere.  And the times when Brad has had the boys to himself, they have stayed at home while I've gone off somewhere else.

So this was new.

This leaving me behind business.

And I didn't like it one bit.

When your whole world drives away without you, and all you're left with is this really empty feeling and way crazy, unnecessary and unhealthy thoughts tumbling through your head, it causes an insane case of anxiety.

I was having a really hard time.

For whatever reason, I was reminded of a woman's story I had read/heard/seen somewhere; a woman who had lost her entire family in a car accident when they traveled somewhere without her.  Morbid, I know, but that seems to be how my crazy head works sometimes.  I think about scenarios that aren't likely to happen and dwell on them until I hear their sweet voices on the other end of the phone telling me they made it safe and sound.

Because I'm crazy.

And have control issues.

Or maybe lack of faith.

Or I'm just crazy.

I told Brad that he has to come back to me or I'll be living with my parents f.o.r.e.v.e.r.

I might be crazy, but I'm funny, too. :) 

Suffice it to say, they did arrive safe and sound, and when we Skyped today, Reed's first statement was, "We're ok!"  {He later asked, "You okay at your house, Mama?"}

So that was yesterday.  Today, I'm a whole new woman!  What's a girl to do when the men of the house are gone?  Play, that's what!  I've been working on several fun projects and I'm knee deep in some serious Mama downtime.

Walks in the sunshine?  Check.

Blog hopping?  Check.

Scrapbooking?  Check.

Cereal for supper?  Check.

I'll be good until Wednesday, when the boys begin their trek back home.

Then I'll be a nervous wreck again.

{So where did the boys go?  Some people opt to go to Florida or a tropical island or on a cruise for spring break.  Not us (you think I'd let those boys do that without me????).  We just hop from one grandparents' house to another!  :)  They are in Pella, enjoying the 75 degree golfing weather.}